So long, it's been good to know ya!

Well, here it is - my last post from Doris Avenue. It's been a long winter but now the sun is shining and the grass and trees are refreshingly green - it all happened very suddenly as May arrived. Temperatures flipped from 'Brrr!' to 'Phew!'. It's still pretty changeable - we had snow flurrries again last weekend!

I have paused in my sorting and packing to get this up to date. I'm bringing as much as I can home with me on Saturday as the items for shipping won't be leaving yet and it's quite tricky working out what I might need in the meantime! I'm definitely bringing my favourite potato peeler! Eamonn's job situation isn't resolved yet so he will arrange the shipping after he gets back from his short stay in London. I'm hoping to leave everything well sorted and organised so he won't find it too bothersome! He'll also have the headache of selling all the furniture and the car - I don't envy him that.

 Back in February, while the snow was still lying in heaps everywhere, I led a Newcomers' visit to Spadina House, one of the few, genuinely old properties in Toronto. Pronounced originally 'Spadeena', from the native name for 'hill', it is usually pronounced 'Spadinah' now. This is a beautifully restored house, dating from 1866, owned by three generations of a wealthy Toronto banking family. It originally stood surrounded by 80 acres of farmland and orchards and gardens. The last member of the family handed the house over to the City in 1978. What made this such a pleasure to visit was that the house is so authentic - almost everything in the house was originally owned by the family. I have visited another old house here owned by an important Toronto figure but it contained only one chair actually used by the family, the rest was of the period but not original to the house so Spadina House has a very genuine feel. It shows how styles changed from the mid-Victorian times to 1930s Colonial revival and includes pieces from the Arts and Crafts, Art Nouveau and Art Deco movements. Much of the furniture was made here too. Coming from England, where we're surrounded by so much heritage I was glad to have such a satisfying tour. 

 

The weather was so punishing in February and March that there were many days I really didn't want to go out and then the swimming pool was out of action so for a large part of that time I thought I might take root on the sofa! Fortunately, I have got to know some lovely women here and they were wonderful at motivating me to get out and about - even if it were just for a cosy chat over coffee in a weather-protected mall! I finished my art history course too which gave me another excuse not to go out. I have enjoyed the Newcomers' Walk-Fit sessions and the one in early March was 8km of a gruelling stomp through deep frozen snow! It's very tiring walking in frozen footsteps! But at the end of this walk we were invited to the home of a lovely Japanese Newcomer, who restored us with her home-made cakes and sweets and pots of tea and coffee, all delivered in elegant Japanese style!

 One weekend Eamonn and I went to a local park which provides small-scale skiing for the locals.

Gradually the days got brighter and we enjoyed a lovely day out at Easter in a woodland area with two young expat families here. We even had hotdogs toasted over an open fire! We were also given s'mores - a yummy sandwich of  toasted marshmallow and chocolate between biscuits - they have to be Graham's crackers for some reason! It's a traditional campfire treat eaten particularly at scouting and girl guiding camps.

We had a lovely meal out with friends on my birthday and then we had a quiet Easter - Eamonn had bought some birthday daffodils for me and I bought some little eggs for us but what a disappointment they were! The box clearly said 'egg', the picture showed an egg but inside they were just 'Bounty' shaped lumps of chocolate! It just wasn't the same!

 

After Easter I went to a maple syrup festival at  a local Conservation Area, Kortright. We were shown the method used for making maple syrup by the early pioneers and then we saw the more modern technique. In the past, the maple sap was collected in buckets by tapping the trees. The water in the sap was then boiled off - the sap looks like water and is almost tasteless but after this process it achieves its distinctive colour and flavour. The modern means of collection involves a grid-like network of plastic tubes connecting the trees which run from the taps joining larger tubes, using gravity to flow into a tank in the processing shed where it is boiled and bottled. There is a very short season for the collection of maple sap and Quebec is Canada's largest producer. At the time we were there it was still bitterly cold so that the sap had stopped running and had frozen in the buckets!

 

A great highlight for my birthday was going to see Lianne La Havas in the Opera House, once a classical music venue but now a place for 'young people's' events. Gemma had arranged it for us. This young London performer is touring over here and is doing very well - she has a lovely voice and a charming way of communicating with the audience; she writes all her own material. I was rather nervous about being surrounded by so many young'ns but we realised there were some oldies like us upstairs, so we found ourselves a rail to lean on and had a great time! Eamonn even splashed out on a taxi to get us home ($50 later!).

A great thing about being part of the Newcomer activities is that we learn a lot from each other but sometimes we have opportunities to learn a bit more from the professionals. The Photography Group had a walk along the Lakeshore with a professional photographer who gave us tips on how to get more out of our cameras - whether iPhones, point-and-shoots or SLRs like mine. It was fun having time just to experiment and try things out - some of them even crouching on the ground to get some interesting angles! I can't say I learned much as I forget what I've tried almost straightaway!

 

Along the Lakeshore are 3 'wave decks', just fun places to walk around. There are also sailing, kayaking and canoeing schools here. I've seen some people learning paddle boarding here too.

Here is one of the memorials to the Fire Service: it shows a fireman carrying a baby from a burning building.

The city has at last realised that the Lakeshore should be a place where people can relax and should not be hogged by the developers! But what this little beach area needs is a little hut selling ice cream and tea!

When a well-loved member left Newcomers recently, after 4 years here, she was given a quilt of signatures. She is a lovely Japanese lady who went to almost all the activities and became the Club's photo archivist, recording everything that has been happening! The quilt making was top secret, co-ordinated by the very talented ladies in the quilters' group and it was presented to her at a special tea. Considering that this involved a large number of women, the secret had been kept and it was a complete surprise to her! She was a member of the quilters' group too so that was even more astonishing!

The last Neighbourhood Walk that I led was to a small area of Toronto called Wychwood Park, which was set up as an artists' colony in the 1880's by an Oxfordshire painter. It is still an exclusive, gated community where the homes, new or old have to conform to an accepted style, although the owners are free to change the interiors. A lake is at the centre,  created by the damming of a local creek, and the houses are arranged around a winding road. The house numbers follow no pattern at all!  

Many of the houses have an interesting history, having been owned by well-known artists. While we were being told about one particular house, once owned by George Reid, the owner happened to be sitting in his front garden and he invited us in - all 20 of us. His family has lived here a long time and they have really looked after the house, keeping it as it was designed. He also had some artefacts owned by George Reid. The idea for this estate is based loosely on our garden suburbs but as you can see the landscaping isn't as manicured as we're used to! 

 

I have spent a lot of time recently making the most of the early summer weather by going for walks with Gillian during the week and Eamonn at the weekend. Of course my mid-week walks are punctuated by visits to coffee shops and we have built up quite a repertoire now! It's much more fun to seek out the independent coffee shops and avoid Tim Horton's and Starbucks! 

 

Osgoode Hall (Law Courts) and the Canada Life Building, complete with weather beacon.



Interesting fact: Insulin was developed at the University of Toronto by Banting and Best.

 The Gladstone Hotel - a trendy boutique hotel with art exhibitions and music.


 A giant inukshuk by the Lake.





















Strolling by the Lakeshore.

It makes headline news here when the blossom appears on the trees in High Park. It's a popular place to walk and relax for families throughout the year but the Newcomers always try to time one of their walks to coincide with this blossom show so, in the end, less of  a walk-fit and more of a stroll!

For those few days the park is heaving but it's still easy enough to get away from the crowds and enjoy the space.






















It's very popular with photographers and there always seems to be a bride!
 
 








The Lake, a popular spot for the red-winged blackbirds.





 
 

Sculpture of  'Immigrant Family' by Tom Otterness, Downtown.

< The view south down Yonge Street at the end of our road which is to the left. 

There will be a new shiny building in the foreground where the ramshackle take-away food shops are. The reflection shows where we first lived when we arrived. In the distance you can see an almost-complete development which has grown since we arrived. Yonge Street will eventually become a corridor!

But a short walk from us is this little fountain in the cemetery. There are lots of fountains around the city but most of them aren't switched on before summer.

Last night Eamonn and I saw 'This House' via NT Live, a really entertaining look back at the 1970s in the House of Commons. We were a young, newly married couple then and were blissfully ignorant of so much that happened; we certainly didn't realise that so many MPs died in that time, many of overwork, particularly those MPs who had come into politics from mining and heavy industrial careers.

Well, my last days here have been happy with companionship and coffee. One friend arranged a little tea party for me in her garden and another friend took me on a coffee shop crawl for the day! I am looking forward to getting home to enjoy home-making and being able to make myself useful somewhere but I have fantastic memories of my time here, getting to know women from all over the world. We have so much in common but our differences make us so interesting to each other. It's hard to know how to finish but I can only say a big 'Thank you' to all those who have shared our journey in any way. Thank you to Michael and Gemma for visiting and being there on Skype! Thank you to our new friends for giving us such happy times and Thank you to old friends for all your support. We just have to hope that Eamonn won't be too long following me back! 

Looking forward to seeing you all again,

With love,
Mary and Eamonn

It's February at last!

 Hello! Much appreciation to anyone who's still there! I thought it was about time I got back into the blogger-sphere and brought  things up to date. 

We came back on January 7th after a wonderful few weeks at home. As I write, it's the first Bank Holiday weekend of 2013 - it's Family Day tomorrow while it's President's Day (Washington's birthday) in the US. Temperatures, with wind chill, are in negative double figures. It looks lovely outside today as the sun is shining but it's quite painful to be out for long as we discovered on a walk yesterday. At least Torontonians are happy now that they have a winter like the ones they used to have! We've had a couple of snowfalls so far. The most recent one came in on a real snowstorm which mostly affected Boston. Although they are well prepared for snow here the initial period is still pretty chaotic. No school buses ran, most schools and colleges were closed and some roads were closed as buses couldn't make the hills but once the snow ploughs took charge things settled down. The snow which fell last week is now beginning to freeze so there are banks of ice along all the roads which won't disappear for some time. While the snow was fresh we had a couple of walks: first we tried one of the ravine trails near here and discovered how difficult it is to walk in 30cm of snow - ideal for snow-shoeing which we weren't prepared for! I suppose I was feeling a bit stir-crazy and decided to take Bear with us so although we didn't walk far we had some fun taking silly photos! There were surprisingly few people around and hardly any children out in it but we did see some serious snow cave building outside a couple of houses. The people here seem very phlegmatic about the snow perhaps because it creates so much work. I've spoken to people who dutifully cleared their drives and the pavement outside their house, as they must within 12 hours to avoid a big fine, only to find that a snow plough has cleared the road, helpfully piling the heavy, icy snow across their drives again! Here you can see a 2 foot high bank of snow which is making life difficult for anyone trying to reach the bus! There are health warnings too as some weaker, older people collapse with the effort of shovelling snow. Many parts of the city use 'sidewalk plows' to clear paths which would be great to see at home but Toronto is a pretty flat city with wide pavements and roads. I think they'd struggle a bit on some of our local roads!









Most house owners here use snow blowers to clear the powdery snow on to their front lawns. It is illegal to blow it into the road, hoping that the snow plough will shift it for you! Of course, the snow which affected us fell across the Maritime Provinces too. As always the media make such a fuss about the weather: a young man interviewed in Nova Scotia while shovelling his drive told the journalist: 'It's Canada - it's winter - it's not Armageddon!'
Our local walk took us through the cemetery which was the last place we expected to find a snowman! It's quite unusual to see snowmen here - snow is probably not enough of a novelty and of course the temperatures can be off-putting.

Just before the snow arrived Eamonn had a fall at work. He was checking activity on the roof and slipped, spraining his wrist in the process. He said the roof was covered in a very slippery membrane which made me wonder why he was on it in the first place but apparently he'd walked on it many times before! As a result of his accident anyone who needs to go on the roof has to have a permit now. As this project is coming towards completion there are deadlines to be met. The first of these has passed now but it was necessary to have Saturday working in January. It was really a case of 'all hands on deck' but despite the urgency anyone who wasn't in the right union had to be careful not  to be caught doing things they shouldn't! One manager was helpfully taking rubbish out and was stopped because a labourer should have been doing it - so a union rep was called! Eamonn sneaked in a couple of tools to do some jobs which hadn't been completed and had to listen out in case he was caught too!
I've been taking part in my usual Newcomer activities - coffee mornings, walks and a couple of talks too. In January we celebrated International Women's Day with a talk by Rita Karakas, an expert in international development and humanitarian service delivery who has worked as CEO of Save the Children (Canada) and with Oxfam and many similar organisations in 72 countries. She spoke movingly about her work for social justice and human rights in so many strife-ridden areas. She has worked particularly towards the improvement of women's rights in health and education. The more education a woman has the longer she will delay starting a family, to a point where she is able to choose when she is ready to provide for a child. She explained that loans given to support local industry are often given to women rather than men as they are more likely to be used as intended and are are also much more likely to be repaid. She has witnessed how trying to survive in areas of desperate need reveals the brutality of human nature - girl babies and disabled children are always fed last. The demographics of India, Pakistan and China are now skewed because so many girl babies have been aborted because girls are seen as a burden and they take their assets to another family upon marriage. It is important to improve the health of midwives who have a far greater impact than doctors in crisis areas as far more can be trained in a shorter time. She described how she was involved in developing the training of 200 midwives in South Asia but they all died in the tsunami of 2004. She emphasised 5 Rights: firstly, the Right to life with dignity; we are not born equal but we are entitled to equal treatment. Secondly, the Right to a livelihood (not necessarily a job) in order to be able to provide for a family. Thirdly, the Right to safety and security of the body and of the home. She described rape as the systematic tool of war: rape isn't just against a woman, it is also against the honour of her family or tribe. In many societies the woman is the instrument of ethnic or religious punishment. The fourth Right, the Right to a voice means that people should be able to be active in a union without the threat of death. The 5th Right is the right to be protected. It was interesting that as well as having experience of Africa and Asia she also has experience of First Nations issues here in Canada. She explained that some of the difficulties arising recently among the First Nations people stem from conflicts between those groups which are party to Government treaties versus those who are not, which are seen as less worthy, lower down the pecking order. This seems to account for some of the infighting which prevents the First Nations from presenting a united front when dealing with the Federal Government. The elders and women are losing their influence which has been a significant feature of the past. Although she has seen such hardship at very close quarters she had some funny stories too - she described how she arrived in Oxford to work for Oxfam and needed to buy a fridge but when she saw how small our fridges were compared to what she was used to she cried! - which seems ironic considering her job.

 
Her mention of First Nations' problems coincided with the coverage in the media here of a protest movement called 'Idle No More'. To be more accurate there are 3 aboriginal groups: the First Nations people, the Metis, who are of mixed European and First Nations' heritage, and Inuit peoples. These last are indigenous people of the Arctic regions of Greenland, Canada, US and Eastern Siberia. These groups have cultural origins reaching back thousands of years. Their campaign aims to protect the natural resources of air, water and land for future generation and 'Idle No More' reflects the growing attitude that they must do more to protect their way of life. Canada is immensely rich in natural resources and many First Nations' people live on land to which the Government would like greater access. Amnesty International and the Green Party support them in their claims and say that their rights should be respected when issuing licences for logging, mining and other forms of resource extraction as the people do not benefit enough from the profits that are made. There have been protests all over Canada and other countries in support of their cause. First Nations' groups suffer much higher unemployment, are more likely to be imprisoned, have more health problems and a lower life expectancy at birth, have lower educational achievement, experience greater poverty and have a higher suicide rate than the general Canadian population. The protestors feel that a Bill recently passed by the Government will remove environmental protection from the lakes and rivers, making it easier for projects to access waterways for pipelines, bridge-building, laying power lines, etc. Such access has often been denied in the past on the grounds of impeding navigation. The Canadians are sometimes embarrassed by these issues when they come to the fore. A female chief recently went on a liquid-only diet hoping to force the Prime Minister and Governor General to meet with the Chiefs to discuss aboriginal rights. She succeeded only in meeting with the Governor General and eventually gave up her protest. But last year, she had to declare a state of emergency in her community because of crisis levels in housing and poverty despite the fact that a diamond mine was being built on their land. The International Red Cross offered to step in and provide essential relief and ordinary Canadians were asked to donate to their cause. Sadly, the First Nations' voice may be heard but is not listened to because their campaign seems to lack focus and a unified approach.


The other talk I went to was on 'Third Culture Kids'. This was a new phrase to me but it describes the situation that many young people find themselves in when they are part of an Expat family. It is not a new concept in that diplomatic and military families have long experience of this kind of life but the term was coined in the 1950's and has become something of a label. A Newcomer member who works in this area showed two short films which highlighted the issues for us. The basic problem is that people have no sense of belonging when they may have been born in one country but have moved many times in their formative years. They have experience of  their first home culture and that of their parents but the third culture is wherever they happen to be. There is the feeling that they need to blend in but can find it difficult to fit in. There was an interesting discussion following the films as many of the Newcomer members are Third Culture Kids themselves. Children in this situation often attend international schools and feel more comfortable making 'international ' friends. As one mother explained, her teenage children are 'British' but can't talk about the British way of life because they left when they were small. Other members have parents of different nationalities, attended school in a third country so are neither one thing nor another. There are many positives in being so well travelled but there seem to be an equal number of negatives. Knowing that another move is never far off can make it very difficult to be motivated to do well at school and although some people may have serious identity issues many people adapt quickly and do well as a result. The situation is more confused where not only language but cultural differences are great. We saw the example of a girl, living now in New York who is half Japanese, half British, feels that she is not British enough, nor Japanese enough and needs to make special effort to learn about particular customs for her trips back to Japan. There seem to be 3 types of response to being a Third Culture Kid: the chameleon learns to adapt and fit in as well as possible, the screamer refuses to fit in and fights against adaptation and the wallflower who just withdraws from the challenges or the benefits of life in a new culture.


We've been out to see a couple of films - loved Les Miserables and Argo and hope to see some of the other Oscar nominated ones soon. We had a great time watching 'The Magistrate' via NT Live too. We also experienced something new with a couple of friends: we went out one Sunday to a brunch and a show called 'Love Train'. It was a live show of music performed by some very talented singers. They re-created all the soul hits of the 60's and 70's which I really liked. All this after a good meal chosen from a giant buffet. I think some people were in competition to see who could get the most food on their plate! I'm continuing with my Art History class which I really enjoy - when the tutor began to talk about John Constable I got quite excited. She showed 'The Haywain' of course and I got to tell the class that not only is that little house still there but that I had stayed in it many times, with children from school! They were very surprised to know that Willy Lott's cottage still stands! On the other hand, I have left the choir as I was enjoying it less and less and decided to call it a day. I like to think that we might be back in the Spring or early Summer so I found it hard to really commit to it. We have no firm plans yet but I do feel we've done our time here!

Recent items reported as 'News' here: a man created a miniature curling rink made of Lego, and, 4 stolen dogs were returned to their owners!! 

I'll say cheerio for now and hope to hear from you soon!

With love from 
Mary and Eamonn